Outrage: why O'Donnell isn't fit for office

Yes, I know, Jesus cries when you don't vote Republican.

But I am outraged at the Republican candidate for Senate in Delaware: Christine O'Donnell.

Here she is ok:



But let us remember: she is running for a powerful office. She will have responsibilities, if she wins.

So, a few years ago, she had an encounter:

I barely knew Christine when she turned up at my door at around eight o'clock on the night of Halloween. We'd met for the first and only time three months earlier when my two roommates and I signed the lease on our apartment: Christine's aunt owned the place we were moving into, and she happened to be up from Delaware visiting at the time. But we'd only spent about five minutes together that day and we hadn't spoken much, and I hadn't thought of her since.

Yet here she was standing outside my door with a friend. And both of them were pretty tipsy.

Oh...ok, just a little sin there...but the story goes on:

It really didn't take very long for Christine to make her move. She'd grabbed my hand on the way from the apartment to South Street, so I can't say I was totally surprised when she leaned in to kiss me soon after we arrived at the bar.

I could tell when we first met that Christine was older than me. I was 25, and although I never asked her age, I'd have guessed she was in her early 30s. It was only recently that I found out her real age and learned she was in her late 30s when we hooked up. There's a 14-year gap between us, but she looks good for her age. I don't think I'd heard the word "cougar" yet at that point, but that's probably what I'd call her.

Aggressive is another word I'd use to describe her. At the bar, she confessed to me that her aunt really hadn't been sleeping. She hadn't even gone to her apartment to check, she said. She had remembered me from our five-minute meeting the previous summer, and used the story about her aunt as an excuse to knock on my door. She'd set her sights on me from the beginning.

Ok, fair enough...but a little bit of sinning...they went home and

Things got physical on the couch pretty quickly. It wasn't long before we'd moved from the living room to my bed.

I won't get into the nitty gritty details of what happened between the sheets that evening. But I will say that it wasn't half as exciting as I'd been hoping it would be. Christine was a decent kisser, but as soon as soon as her clothes came off and she was naked in my bed,[...]

Well there! But now comes the outrage:

When her underwear came off, I immediately noticed that the waxing trend had completely passed her by.that was a big turnoff, and I quickly lost interest. I said goodnight, rolled over, and went to sleep.

WHAT????? This so called "cougar" gets her prey into bed and can't close the deal?

If she can't close the deal in the US, how do we expect her to close the deal in office!

This is an outrage!!!

I am canceling the check that I sent to her campaign.



No Sweetie...you aren't me. I never would have failed that badly in that situation.

Guess Who Saved Those Miners: JESUS!

Really.

The Chile mine rescue

The rescue of the trapped miners in Chile is a truly wonderful story. The careful plan put together by international teams seems to be working smoothly in bringing the stoic miners back to the surface and 21 of the 33 have been rescued so far, after spending over two months trapped half-a-mile below the surface. See here for how the rescue was carried out. It is a triumph of perseverance, endurance, cooperation, patience, technology, and science.

But apparently three different Christian denominations are claiming it was their prayers that resulted in god intervening that resulted in the successful rescue and are vying to claim credit for the successful rescue.

Well, glory-be! Isn't it obvious? It certainly had nothing to do with science and engineering.

Take THAT Elitists!

If there was ever a candidate that epitomizes current Republicanism, it is Christine "don't need on stupid book learning" O'Donnell:





She is no elitist! As she says, "she didn't go to Yale":

Jesus Works in Mysterious Ways! Atheists are Willing to listen!

Well, Glori-be! Some atheists are looking for a reason to believe!

Dr. Jerry Coyne is one of our nation's most vocal atheists. He is a professor who has written about EVIL-loution (don't buy THIS BOOK) though I wonder why, given his credentials, he couldn't become a professor at a college that had a better football team.

Nevertheless, he has some fame and has written articles in the mainstream media including in this evil, liberal socialist magazine (New Republic) and in USA Today. But I digress.

Here, he is arguing with another scientist about where there could ever be proof of the existence of Jesus (e. g., a God):

So yes, I agree. There is no valid god hypothesis, so there can be no god evidence, so let’s stop pretending the believers have a shot at persuading us.

I’m not “pretending,” and I’m not really on board with P.Z. on this issue. Both Greta Christina and I have written about what sort of evidence would convince us of the existence of a divine celestial being. But maybe P.Z. is a tougher nut to crack. So here’s a challenge to him:

Ok, go ahead and read the challenge.

UPDATE: I knew the stuff about aliens would surface, but let’s be a bit more constructive here. If there’s any evidence that would convince you of God, please describe it. If there’s none, and you could never be convinced by anything that there’s a powerful supernatural being, or anything that’s reasonably God-like, do say so.

Prayer Warriors: let's surf to Professor Coyne's blog and let him have it!

I'll start here: what about the Virgin Birth! How could you possibly deny that this is proof?

Then we have the end times, which were signified by the election of Barack HUSSEIN Obama to the office of President of these (Christian) United States.

Yes, it was sad to see the Best President EVER (George W. Bush) leave office, but President Obama has given the wake up call for Christian Patriots everywhere to rise up and take this country back!

Who could doubt the miracle of the victory of this super patriot in the Republican primary?



We also had audience to the miracle of Speaking in Tongues, as evidenced here by the Prophetess Sarah Palin:

Top Threats to Our Country: Atheists and Yoga!

I've been doing some serious thinking: exactly what is the biggest threat to our country? One of the big threats is atheism:



Will you look at this hussy? If you don't, I assure you that your man will...how DARE she threaten the virtue of our Christian men in this way!

But as bad as a threat to our society as she is, yoga is an even worse threat. Of course, our Godly men of the cloth are all over it:

A Southern Baptist leader who is calling for Christians to avoid yoga and its spiritual attachments is getting plenty of pushback from enthusiasts who defend the ancient practice.

Southern Baptist Seminary President Albert Mohler says the stretching and meditative discipline derived from Eastern religions is not a Christian pathway to God.

Mohler said he objects to "the idea that the body is a vehicle for reaching consciousness with the divine."

"That's just not Christianity," Mohler told The Associated Press.

Mohler said feedback has come through e-mail and comments on blogs and other websites since he wrote an essay to address questions about yoga he has heard for years.

"I'm really surprised by the depth of the commitment to yoga found on the part of many who identify as Christians," Mohler said.

Yoga fans say their numbers have been growing in the U.S. A 2008 study by the Yoga Journal put the number at 15.8 million, or nearly 7 percent of adults. About 6.7 percent of American adults are Southern Baptists, according to a 2007 survey by the Pew Research Center Forum on Religion & Public Life.

Mohler argued in his online essay last month that Christians who practice yoga "must either deny the reality of what yoga represents or fail to see the contradictions between their Christian commitments and their embrace of yoga."

He said his view is "not an eccentric Christian position."

But there is even more going on: the women who practice yoga are...well...sluts who are after the men who go to class!

Just look at them, wearing very tiny or very tight clothing and bending over each way (and here too):







Just look at it!



How are our (weak) Christian men supposed to stay pure if they watch this?

More things that Puzzle Harriet:

Where is the joke? This fellow seems like a God Fearing Patriotic Republican to me!

Liberal Media Continue to Tout Republicans

I have to admit, I don't understand why the Liberal media keeps shining the spotlight on Republicans, especially where the Republicans shine the most! Here are but a few examples:



That's right! We don't want any cultists in our party! Are you listening, Mitt Romney and Orrin Hatch?

And of course, we want to regulate homos:



In fact, if you aren't with us 100 percent, you are against us!



And we have THE BEST candidates!

Here is Christine O'Donnell



And an example of a serious scientist, Art Robinson (who doesn't fall for this global warming fallacy)