Saturday, January 31

Thanks, Libs! Jesus Just Delivered the Winter Storm You Ordered!



Hello Children,

After days of intermittent power outages and numerous internets failures, them no-account layabouts at the power company finally got their act together and have managed to keep the lights on for more than a couple hours! 

It's like they didn't even listen to my cogent, well-reasoned arguments that us wealthy folks need power more than welfare moms, hospitals, or so-called "homeless shelters" (country clubs for lazy poor people)! 

Even my pointing out that us monied folks DESERVE to have our power on before everybody else (since we got the money, we're more likely to spend it, thus it'll "trickle-down" to the unwashed masses. Not unlike that time my medication temporarily weakened my urethra, blessing my garden with its own version of "trickle down") fell on deaf ears!

Anyhow, so much for them "scientists" and their red herring for socialism, CLIMATE CHANGE

Global warming my foot! Why are getting snow in a "warming world"?? Check and mate, libs!

And don't y'all let them no-good libs try telling you that this past week's disasterous ice storms was anything other than God's judgement on America for voting for "President" Barack HUSSEIN Obama! Libs like America's most dangerous illegal immigrant:


Disgusting!  

We REAL Americans know that all this here focus on "infrastructure" is just another attempt at Marxism! The free market, unshackled from its over-regulation by libs, proves itself superior to socialism in EVERY endeavor in EVERY instance!

Power grid rotting from the inside out like a microwaved steak: Raise prices till you can upgrade. The "poor" will just have to deal with it, or go without. Or maybe they'll stop being so lazy, they'll stop accepting government handouts and go get a job!

Everybody wins!

-Norma Jean

Tuesday, January 27

Creationists: America's Holy Scientists



Hello Children,

Just more Godly Righteousness from them great folks at ICR. 

The Greatest Scientists - the ones most responsible for great discoveries - were Creationists. Now they have their own page on Facebook (accessible from www.icr.org/fb) that you can share with your friends.

Each time you become a fan of Kepler, Newton, Bell or Boyle, your friends on Facebook will be intrigued by these Great Scientists and their testimonies.

In the coming weeks, we will expand the Great Scientists pages, adding to your resources for sharing the truth that the Bible is scientifically accurate. Become a fan of ICR and the Great Scientists who honored God as their Creator on Facebook! www.icr.org/fb

Demand the Evidence. Get it @ ICR

Praise Jesus! Just goes to prove that you don't got to subscribe to "science" to be a scientist.

You read that Godless Darwinists?! You're going to HELL!

-Norma Jean

Barack Hussein Obama: the Illegitimate President



Hello Children,

I done got myself an Exclusive Story! 

I ain't sure why nobody else has seen this!

I can't take credit for the discovery though. Great American patriot Billy Bob Neck tuned me onto it: 

Even if'n Barack HUSSEIN Obama did indeed touch the Bible - I don't think he did - Supreme Court Justice Roberts "flubbed"* the swearing in. So they had to have a second swearing in, as you can read {Here}

Now take a look:


That's right, children! He ain't got his hand on no Bible! And if'n he ain't got his hand on the Bible, his swearing in is NULL AND VOID! It's in the Constitution!  

Now is the time for George W. Bush (the best President EVER) to ride in and take the reins of leadership once again! 

Now all I got to do is contact that most distinguished Kentuckian, Mitch McConnel, and let him know the good news! I reckon he'll get hold of the proper authorities and arrest that Manchurian Candidate right quick! 

-Norma Jean

* I'd wager Ol' John had this in mind all along! Once George W. Bush is President again, I'd say he deserves the Congressional Medal of Honor, or something along there!  



EDIT 1/31/09: Never mind, children. Apparently good ol' Glenn Beck already covered this. And Mitch didn't seem too interested in listening to my arguments (got to check and see if'n he's been brainwashed by Obama voodoo).

Bill Kristol: the Republicans' John Locke



Hello Children,

Looks like one of them Hollywood libs is about to suffer a black eye...of the EGO!!

Via my new best friends over at Gateway Pundit (America's Number 1 repository of non-partisan truth, 100% verifiable facts and statistics, and never pulls a quote out of context), you can follow below:

Iraq War Challenge: Bill Kristol Agrees to Debate Matt Damon

Oh, Please, Please, Please....

Big Hollywood is offering Far Left actor Matt Damon $100,000 to debate conservative author Bill Kristol on the Iraq War:

On Sunday afternoon Weekly Standard editor and (former) New York Times columnist Bill Kristol — in an email exchange with Big Hollywood — agreed to debate Matt Damon on his Hollywood home turf after being informed the 38-year old actor ridiculed Kristol in an interview in the Miami Herald.

“He’s an idiot — he wrote that we should be grateful to George Bush because he won the Iraq war. We! Won! The! War!”
As the sponsor of the event, Big Hollywood is offering $100,000 to Damon (or to the charity or carbon credit of his choice) to publicly debate Kristol at a mutually agreed upon time, date and venue.
So what are the odds that this Hollywood lib takes the challenge?
They could put that on pay-per-view. 


Bill Kristol, one of Conservatism's greatest intellectual minds, would mop the floor with any of them liberal elites! 

Don't believe me? Just watch him tear this lib apart:



As my grandbaby Rebecca Ruth would say, "owned"!

-Norma Jean

Obama: Indoctrinator-in-Chief



Hello Children,

I just thought I'd point out another reason to completely distrust ol' "President" Barack HUSSIEN Obama that I forgot all about: he was a PROFESSOR

A ol' hat tip, or wag of the finger, to My Life Thinly Disguised as Groove:


A dadblame, liberal elite "educator" responsible for the indoctrination of untold legions of poor, misled children.

I long for the days when we could rely on the good horse sense of President George W. Bush (the best President EVER!).



-Norma Jean

Monday, January 26

Libs & Their Secret War on America



Hello Children,

Well it ain’t no surprise to ol’ Norma Jean, but “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama just keeps on chipping away at America’s security, working overtime to secure her complete and total destruction.

Them lib traitors just couldn’t wait to open up America to terrorist attack! And they done started that on “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s first day!

From MotherJones {Here} or just follow: 

Obama to Bush: I Can Release Your Records. Don't Like It? Sue.

On his first day in office, President Obama put former president Bush on notice. His administration just released an executive order that will make it difficult for Bush to shield his White House records--and those of former Vice President Dick Cheney--from public scrutiny by invoking the doctrine of executive privilege. Shortly after taking office, Bush handed down his own executive order, amending the Presidential Records Act to give current and past presidents, along with their heirs, veto power over the release of presidential records, which are considered the property of the American people.

"[Obama]'s putting former presidents on notice that if you want to continue a claim of executive privilege that [Obama] doesn't think is well-placed, you're going to have to go to court," says Anne Weismann, the chief counsel for Citizens for Ethics and Responsibility in Washington (CREW).

During the campaign, Obama promised to "nullify attempts to make the timely release of presidential records more difficult." (A transition spokesperson promised Mother Jones essentially the same thing when we asked a few weeks ago.) That was a reference to former president Bush's infamousExecutive Order 13233, which gave current and former presidents and vice presidents, along with their heirs, unprecedented authority to block the disclosure of White House records. But Obama's taken his campaign promise a step further. While revoking 13233, Obama has also put forth a far stricter interpretation of executive privilege:

[T]he Executive Order on Presidential Records brings those principles [of openness and transparency] to presidential records by giving the American people greater access to these historic documents. This order ends the practice of having others besides the President assert executive privilege for records after an administration ends. Now, only the President will have that power, limiting its potential for abuse. And the order also requires the Attorney General and the White House Counsel to review claims of executive privilege about covered records to make sure those claims are fully warranted by the Constitution.

Weismann explains:

[Obama]'s basically saying if there's a dispute, and a former president thinks something should be covered by executive privilege and Obama doesn't agree, then Obama would direct the Archivist to release it [despite the former president's claim of privilege]. The only option a former President would have at that point would be to go to court and sue. [Obama]'s set up a process to review these claims which requires the Attorney General and White House Counsel to agree that these claims should be invoked, which indicates that it won't be either casually invoked or casually defended.

In Obama's remarks on Wednesday morning, he said that, "Going forward, anytime the American people want to know something that I or a former President wants to withhold, we will have to consult with the Attorney General and the White House Counsel, whose business it is to ensure compliance with the rule of law. Information will not be withheld just because I say so. It will be withheld because a separate authority believes my request is well grounded in the Constitution." The effect of that particular phrase is enormous, as emphasized by the response of a reader over at Talking Points Memo who works for the Justice Department. "That highlighted phrase has signaled a significant discussion around these parts." You can be certain that Obama's early moves to promote government transparency and accountability will be the subject of discussion and debate for a long time to come.

Disgusting! It shouldn’t be up to the American people, or Congress, or even the Constitution to decide what the President tells them! If’n he don’t want to tell us nothing, well by golly that’s good enough for me!

Well, so long as it’s President Bush (the best President EVER), then that’s good enough for me.

But now that we got ourselves a Manchurian Candidate/closet Moslem/evil atheist lib, we need some protection against the executive branch having that sort of power. I shudder to think what this lib “President” could do if’n he had that sort of power!

Fortunately I ain’t the only one who ain’t all caught up in “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama fever, a.k.a. the lib Messiah, a.k.a. the Abortionist Enabler, a.k.a. the anti-Constitutional Imam!

My new best friends over at Gateway Pundit already know the horror that comes from strict adherence to Constitutional “rights” {Here} or below…

Rejoice! Bush's War is Over

Thank goodness we all survived the madness.
Bush's 'War' On Terror Comes to a Sudden End



This article totally confirms what we've all been thinking.
The Left (including the media) believe this was Bush's war.

There was no threat.
It was our fault. If we change and be nice they will change and be nice.
It's not a battle against Islamofascism. That's a madeup Bush term.
Barack Obama will lead us to a valley of honeysuckle and rainbows.

Keep this article in mind on how the Obama Administration is stripping our country of the tools to keep us safe:

Key components of the secret structure developed under Bush are being swept away: The military's Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, facility, where the rights of habeas corpus and due process had been denied detainees, will close, and the CIA is now prohibited from maintaining its own overseas prisons. And in a broad swipe at the Bush administration's lawyers, Obama nullified every legal order and opinion on interrogations issued by any lawyer in the executive branch after Sept. 11, 2001. 

It was a swift and sudden end to an era that was slowly drawing to a close anyway, as public sentiment grew against perceived abuses of government power.
It only took 3 days.

How dare these lib terror-appeasers try to shut down President Bush’s (the best President EVER) greatest, most inspiring legacy?!?!


Just like a “Dummycrat” to lay the foundation for more terrorists!

It’s also just like them libs to be TRAITORS! Just look at how they done got that Said Al-Rabihim shipped back to his home country of Saudia Arabia, only to have him turn around and work for Al-Qaida!

You think it was Conservatives what did that?? You think it was President Bush that let them fellers go back??

No siree Bob! It was libs! Despite what raving leftwing mainstream media apologists got to say:


That’s what happens when you don’t sacrifice your ideals! Or as “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama put it {Here}:
As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations.
 

Well, I got a saying too, libs! “You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs”. I ain’t sure what awesomely wise politician once said that, but you best keep it in mind next time these libs try to “preserve” your freedoms!

-Norma Jean

Sunday, January 25

Sunday Funnies: Why, Chuck? Why?!

Hello Children,

This week's edition of Sunday Funnies is just so, so disappointing.

It started out well enough, with good ol' Chuck Asay...


See? He correctly points out that the libs are responsible for the recession! The free market was chugging along just fine til they decided to over-regulate everything. 

But then came this one here...


It's like he's implying President Bush (the best President EVER) was somehow responsible for this country's whopping deficit. Even though we all know it's cause of them tax-and-spend libs! Just like below: 


Now that ain't just RIGHT, it's dadblame funny! Leave it to the libs to bail out their buddies on Main Street, when it's them poor Wall Street firms doing the REAL suffering!

But this 'un below...it's just...a horrible LIE!!


How can Chuck Asay draw such FILTH??? 

It's like he done fell victim to the lib lies that President Bush (the best President EVER) somehow ain't the best President EVER!

Wake up, Chuck! Us REAL Americans know the TRUTH

When you gonna rejoin us?

-Norma Jean

Friday, January 23

You Americans & Your Antiquated Ideals! I am LOLing!



Comrades,

I am trusting that you adjust to the dangers of life under your new President, yes?

Very little I am saying today, for I have been saying it many times already. But even still am I becoming confused at your country’s obsession with “rights” and “laws”.

Your fascist propagandist Bill O’Reilly continues to impress me. One day he is droning on about the importance of your “Founding Fathers” and their quaint notions of “liberty”, and the next he is advocating their repeal (@ 4:12):




Is the possessing of advanced syphilitic brain disease a perquisite for hosting a Fox News program? If so, I am ready, comrades!


To be continuing, I am also often confounded by your Supreme Court’s obsessing over “due process” and “search and seizure” cases. I am sure comrades Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, or even mentally-defect Glenn Beck would be agreeing with me that the State MUST be possessing of a strong, unquestioned police presence!

How else are you going to be apprehending and punishing criminals? Civilian courts?! Comrades, you are making me LOL much!

Category:
Posted on: December 10, 2008 9:09 AM, by Ed Brayton

Balko caught this story and I think it's great. The page he links to got taken down due to high traffic, but here's what it said. This was done by a former cop:

KopBusters rented a house in Odessa, Texas and began growing two small Christmas trees under a grow light similar to those used for growing marijuana. When faced with a suspected marijuana grow, the police usually use illegal FLIR cameras and/or lie on the search warrant affidavit claiming they have probable cause to raid the house. Instead of conducting a proper investigation which usually leads to no probable cause, the Kops lie on the affidavit claiming a confidential informant saw the plants and/or the police could smell marijuana coming from the suspected house.

The trap was set and less than 24 hours later, the Odessa narcotics unit raided the house only to find KopBuster's attorney waiting under a system of complex gadgetry and spy cameras that streamed online to the KopBuster's secret mobile office nearby.


Here's video of the cops busting into the house and finding nothing but two Christmas trees and cameras taping them:


Why does this matter? Because there can't possibly be any probable cause for getting a warrant to go into this house without one of two things being true: either the police were illegally using thermal sensors to see inside the house or they had a "confidential informant" lie on a warrant request. Balko explains:

To clarify just a bit, according to Cooper, there was nothing illegal going on the bait house, just two evergreen trees and some grow lamps. There was no probable cause. So a couple of questions come up. First, how did the cops get turned on to the house in the first place? Cooper suspects they were using thermal imaging equipment to detect the grow lamps, a practice the Supreme Court has said is illegal. The second question is, what probable cause did the police put on the affidavit to get a judge to sign off on a search warrant? If there was nothing illegal going on in the house, it's difficult to conceive of a scenario where either the police or one of their informants didn't lie to get a warrant.

Apparently, this guy's attorneys have requested a copy of the affidavit filed by the police to secure the warrant and the police can withhold it from them for 60 days. The media is now also asking for a copy of that report. What all of this is going to reveal, almost certainly, is the rank corruption and lawlessness in police vice squads.

The Supreme Court said that using thermal imaging equipment to look inside a house without a warrant was a 4th amendment violation in Kyllo v United States in 2001. It was one of the most interesting lineups I've ever seen in a case. The majority was Scalia, Souter, Thomas, Ginsburg and Breyer; the minority was Rehnquist, O'Connor, Stevens and Kennedy. A very unusual lineup. But the result was clearly correct.

I am hoping you will be forgiving if I once again mourn that your President Bush is no longer in office.

With your President Obama, I am fearing that “Constitution” is once again something to be admired.

I am vomiting in mouth.

-Dasvedanya






Obama Administration in Disarray! Libs Quake in Fear of Jesus' Judgement!



Hello Children,

I reckon we can go on record now as saying that “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s administration is a complete and utter failure!

That’s right, children! We’re only into Obamageddon Day + 3, and already he’s FAILED at just about everything he promised!


My very good friends over at Gateway Pundit have gone into more detail than I will here, but I did just want to make a short list:

  • The economy is still in a recession. Obama FAIL
  • Guantanamo Bay is still open. Obama FAIL
  • The DOW Jones lost over 200 points on Obamageddon Day. According to my buddies over at Gateway Pundit, it was cause them great market prognosticators know how bad “President” Barack HUSSEIN Obama will be for the economy. And we best trust them folks, too. Other than a few teensy, itty-bitty, little mistakes, like failing to see the S&L Collapse, DotCom bubble, the Housing Bubble, the Madoff ponzi scheme fiasco, auto industry collapse, Enron…maybe a few others…they have been right near perfect in their predictions! Obama FAIL
  • Troops are still in Iraq. Obama FAIL
  • Troops are still in Afghanistan. Obama FAIL
  • War on Terror still ain’t won. Obama FAIL
  • War on Drugs still ain’t won. Obama FAIL 

I don’t care what criteria you use, Obama ain’t fixed nothing! Looks like he’s going to have to go back on every campaign promise he made! LOL!

Course, that ain’t gonna stop the liberal mainstream media from trying to prop up this floundering administration:


Edit: Dadblame libs can't even keep up their dadblame links! You can follow it {Here}.

Leave it up to them libs to mock good Christians by parodying that homosexual puppet Elmo!

I can’t wait til 2012. Not just because it will mean voting Barack HUSSEIN Obama out of office, but also cause that’s the year Jesus returns!

Maybe we can convince George W. Bush (the best President EVER) to run again then! What better way for earth to burn to a crisp 'neath Jesus' Righteous Wrath than under the leadership of America’s greatest savior (well, second after Jesus of course).

-Norma Jean

Thursday, January 22

My Revelations of the FUTURE!



Hello Children,

You might remember that I done had a
falling out with my church recently, what with them retreating to the mountains to await Jesus’ Second Coming. And that’s all just a whole heap of crazy nonsense.

Jesus won’t return until 2012.

How do I know? Cause Jesus came to during a fever-induced hallucination to impart to me KNOWLEDGE OF THE HOLY BEYONDNESS!

Just so y’all know, Barack HUSSEIN Obama really is the antichrist, but only in a roundabout, kind-of-his-fault-but-not-completely, type of way. Like them U.S.E.'d women.

When he was just known as “Barry” HUSSEIN OBama as a child, his daddy decided that he’d honor Allah (that’s Satan to you and me) by giving that demon the use of B. HUSSEIN Obama as a vehicle for EVIL. So Allah, a.k.a. Satan, done parked his kiester up inside of B. HUSSEIN Obama’s brain, and has been controlling his every move since. Kinda like an engineer in a train…of EVIL!

So when Allah/Beelzebub decides to make his presence known to the world, he’ll inflate himself up like a blowfish and just stay inside B. HUSSEIN Obama’s body! Satan will be wearing a OBAMA-SUIT!

Then woe be to the world when the Obama-clad Devil orders his minions to construct Giant Killer Death Robots!

Thus will the world know the evils of a closet Moslem/Manchurian Candidate/Obama suit-wearing Satan commanding legions of Giant Killer Death Robots (constructed by evil scientists and engineers! Ain’t they ALL evil?), intent on the subjugation of all Christians!

Other Revelations made known to me:

  • The Middle East shall become a hotbed of violence
  • Israel shall once again know war
  • America will experience wild swings in weather! Some parts of the country will know bitter cold and heavy snow! While at the same time other parts of the nation will know stifling heat and heavy rain! Ominously, a large swath of the nation will experience both at some point during the year!
  • Movies will be released from Hollywood! And some will become so sought-after by Americans, large groups will congregate in darkened buildings to partake of the sinful obsessions!
  • America’s largest cities will serve as incubators of violence, culminating in the deaths of hundreds!
  • Many murders will go unsolved!
  • Edna Rosencratz’s years of whoring catch up to her when she’s publicly outed for having the clap! 
You hear that, Edna! Jesus knows you’re a TRAMP, and He ain’t happy! 

Yes, children. I realize this is all very new and scary, but that is the world America has brought upon itself.

You dadblame whiners were so all-fired up to get rid of President Bush (the best President EVER), that you elected to office the world’s most evil Marxist/Leninist/atheist/Islamofascist/community organizer of all time!
God have mercy on your souls.

Especially yours,  Edna!

-Norma Jean

You Cannot Go Home Again. Thanks Tonnes, Obama!



Comrades,

The remarkable institution of Communism Lite that President George W. Bush created continues to have its foundation undermined by your President Obama. (as President, George W. Bush was quickly establishing your CIA, military, and executive branches to mirror that of the Soviet Union’s triumvirate of KGB, Red Army, and politburo)

Though it was being expected, still I am finding myself disappointed that he has announced the impending closing of your Guantanamo Bay gulag.

Ah well. With Communism sliding away from your executive branch, perhaps your CIA or NSA shall retain a tight grip upon the throat of you Americans, yes?:

Chyort voz'mi! Perhot' podzalupnaya! Tebe Pizd'ets!

Why are you progressives so distrustful of government?? The government exists not just to perpetuate itself, but to protect its interests. And sometimes, maybe protect even you.

Former President Bush was understanding this! He was knowing the State is inerrable! It is NEVER wrong! It is existing to protect you citizens from all that is dangerous…and knowledge is sometimes dangerous, yes?

He was protecting you citizens from painful knowledge of what mistakes government was making.

Is not protection from uncertainties worth the giving up of a few “civil liberties”?

What good is your “freedom of privacy”? If you are not being guilty, you should not be worrying that the State is listening in on your conversing.

And your “right” from “cruel and unusual punishment”: in KGB, we were understanding that fear of cruel and unusual punishment was often an effective deterrent to dissent. Obviously, your former President Bush and Vice President Cheney were comprehending this as well.

It is not important whether prisoners are “guilty” or “innocent”; such antiquated concept as “innocent until proven guilty” is dangerous in this, our dangerous new world, yes?

Better it is to be presuming EVERYONE is guilty of something. Torture therefore is just an expedient method to “facilitate” the truth.

Which also brings us to your “right” to a “fair trial”.

Comrades, why are you still finding this so necessary?

Your Constitution was written before such frightening concepts as “terrorism” and “terrorists” and other “terror”-related terms were coming into existence. Is it not standing to reason that many of the “freedoms” your quaint “contract” should be quietly and secretly amended ?

Former President Bush was also understanding of this. So understanding was he, and so dismayed at reluctance of American public to concept of torture, he was being forced to outsource it, in the form of “rendition”.

Fortunately, America was not only nation to see the advantages of rendition. So effective has it been proving, that even my old comrades in the KGB have restarted the hobby:


Well, your new President unfortunately is seeing to it the “Rule of Law” return to your country. He is promising a return of fairness to trials; the presenting of evidence, even!

Nichevo, comrades.

Perhaps someday another Communist-like President will return to power, and my new home shall be looking like my old.

Perhaps someone like your Bill O’Reilly?

-Dasvedanya



Wednesday, January 21

Obama's Inauguration: Exposed By Jesus!



Hello Children,

Today is first full day of the beginning of the end of America.  

This {Here} is from them folks over at Barefoot and Progressive. I decided to take the liberty to highlight the horrible, terrible, disgusting injustices and lies that "President" Barack HUSSEIN Obama done added:



My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition. [then how bout appointing him as your VP, and then stepping down? If’n you were being truthful bout bipartisanship, you’d do this RIGHT AWAY!]

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. [thanks to you dadblame libs!Our nation is at war [cause your lib, terror-appeasing pals didn’t want to make hard decisions years ago, thus leaving it up to Dubya], against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. [no, it’s cause you lib pinkos overregulated the market, raised taxes on the rich – depriving them of income to trickle down to the unwashed masses – and spent irresponsibly! This is the libs’ fault, don’t you try blaming nobody else!] Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered [That there’s just the free market! Don’t like it? Then move to Cuba, commie!]. Our health care is too costly [again, this here is free market. If you ain’t got the money to pay for doctors, then you’ll avoid illness. Supply and demand, Marxist!]; our schools fail too many [we need the free market here to combat all that lib indoctrination and homosexual agenda instituting]; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet [then maybe you libs should quit your whining about “conservation” effort and let them poor, noble, patriotic oil companies drill anywhere and everywhere they want!].

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land - a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics [the only dogma that done strangled America is that of you libs! Trickle down economics works!].

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness [I reckon this is true, but ain’t quite positive].

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions - that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America [you mean into Marxism, you dadblame commie?!].

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act - not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do [always with the education and colleges with you libs! We got too much education, too many universities! What we really need more of is menial work! Free market takes care of the rest!].

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions - who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage [this paragraph is alright, just got to take out “women”, and it’s true!].

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them - that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account - to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day - because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government [government of any size is too big! Don’t matter whether it works or not; government is ALWAYS wrong(not military though, just everything else)!].

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good [more lib hooey! Free market and trickle down worked, dadblame it!].

As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more [now this here is just hate speech directed at President Bush! His wise, learned leadership over the last eight years has proved that Americans need the Constitution, just not exactly the way it was written].

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint [but mostly our tanks and missiles! Why are libs always so lilly-livered?!].

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort - even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet [Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck have both proved beyond shadow of a doubt that global warming is a lie! So who’s more reliable: Rush and Glenn, or a bunch of egghead liberal elite scientists?]We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus - and non-believers [disgusting! Like non-Christians got rights!]. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society's ills on the West - know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist [okay, this whole paragraph just ain’t right! As President Bush demonstrated, the only reliable way of dealing with Moslems is at the end of a gun! That, along with plenty of Christian proselytizing, has been proved to demarginalize EVERYBODY].

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it [wrong again, libs! The free market WORKED! How long before these Marxists learn that they LOST to the free market?! Not only that, but the rich are rich because they’re more RIGHTEOUS is the eyes of God! If’n the poor don’t enjoy poverty, maybe they should stop being lazy, evil, sinful deviants!].

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all [disclaimer: it inhabits Republicans only. Sorry, libs!].

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends - hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism - these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility - a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence - the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny [God calls upon ONLY Conservatives to shape an uncertain destiny].

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed - why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have traveled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world...that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive...that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it]."

America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations [this here paragraph is alright, except it should clarify that God’s grace is upon us REAL Americans, i.e. Christian-Republicans. Everybody else is both wrong and EVIL!].

-Norma Jean